Shallow End Of The Pool: Inaugural Edition

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Whew! do you guys realize how close we came to not having the bestest ever inauguration, all because some makeup artist almost ruined it for all of us by not paying attention to brow trends? You guys are so lucky to have me to keep you from making these kinds of errors. That said, I can't wait until we can all go back to a nice bitchy high-arched brow. That's my favorite, but I'm suffering along with the rest of you through the whole current soft and gentle thing in the name of beauty.

Shallow End of the Pool

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Here we are one day before New Year's Eve. Did you get your end-of-year mani/pedi/brow wax yet? Me either, I'm back with the runaway ... serf look. I'm here to let you know that the new brow is not overly arched. It's not exactly rustic, but you can forget about the super high arch and let the brows look a little fuller. You will feel so smug going into 2009 with the knowledge that your are up on brow fashions.



Tipping Point: Do you still use hairspray? If you do, spritz some on the eyebrow brush and it'll help tame your brows. Or you can just dab on Vaseline, which is the best beauty product in the whole wide world.

Shallow End of the Pool

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So, let's say, for the sake of argument, that you are too lazy to go get a manicure. Or broke. Or busy. Or whatever. You can totally get trophy wife nails with Kiss Feather Light Nail Kit. Yes, they are press-on, but they look sooo much better than back in the old days. The glue has a pink tint to it, so it looks natural underneath the French manicure tip. And they are easy to apply, even if you are a little on the spazzy side. You may not be able to type or do, you know, labor of any kind while wearing them, but they will make your fingers look long and glammy, so it's all about priorities. It costs less than $6 at Walgreens. How can you go wrong?

Shallow End of the Pool

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Recession be damned. I finally got a manicure. Had to be done. I was sporting a look that could best be described as "runaway slave." If you're feeling like you'd like to just don a beret, sit in a Parisian bistro and groove to Josephine Baker and Edith Piaf, have I got some news for you. OPI's fall/winter line is the La Collection De France, featuring all types of Jerry Lewis-approved shades. I'm wearing Tickle My France-y, which is a nude tone and it's simply, ahem, mauvelous.

Tipping Point: If your nails are brittle, try soaking them for 20 minutes in a little warm olive oil for a week and see if you notice a difference. Popping a biotin every day helps, too.

Shallow End of the Pool

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Brace yourselves: You're going to have to think about neutrals starting right this moment. Geeky Splendor has a bombshell. I got a tip from Hollywood insider Kym Douglas — and this is a direct quote — "Gray is the new purple." This is just a friendly warning, you do not want to end up like Family Ties' Jennifer. I'm only telling you this because I care.

Tipping Point: According to New York Magazine's Spring 2009 fashion show report, beige is gonna be big.